Urban Suburban Mommy – Page 12 – Urban Suburban Mommy

A Tourist In My Own City: Parry Sound, Ontario

Posted on July 14, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Bon Voyage .

When I was asked to write about things that you can do with your child in the north, I got excited! And strangely enough, researching things to do this summer (as I am working part time during the summer) was already on my list.

I am that person that has a list for pretty much everything. Having loose plans/places to go on the days I am not working is something that helps me plan. So, I pulled out the recent Fun in the Sun magazine, questioned some of my friends with children that are a few years older, and I started the 2016 summer to do list!

I was quickly able to compile a list of 10 things to do in the Parry Sound area (aka “up north” or “cottage country” to many) for my son and me. Please note – these are in no particular order…they’re all appealing pending on the day, weather, finances, time of day, if we have company, etc.

1. GET OUTDOORS

I know that this is a tag line used by several businesses in Parry Sound and I think it’s a brilliant “line”. Sure, my list is based on summer activities, but we really are one of the nicest places to not only live, but play/spend time outdoors. Although most need no details, here they are:

Swimming

We have some of the most amazing lakes, and of course Georgian Bay. We have beautiful sandy beaches, and many beaches that offer lifeguards and swimming lessons.

Fishing

As mentioned above that we have a lot of bodies of water, we also have a wide variety of opportunities for fishing. From land. A dock. A boat. A canoe. An island. Just fishing. My husband took Tyson out for his first boat ride where he caught his first fish last month.

Boating

Continuing on with lakes and bays, get out on the water in a boat. Or canoe. Or kayak. Or sailboat. Sail Parry Sound is on the shore of Georgian Bay, and you can see it when walking on the Fitness Trail. Or whatever method of boat you can get your hands on. There are SO many bodies of water to explore and enjoy. And if you don’t own one, you can rent one!

Golf

For the older child (as our mini golf is no longer an option), there are several beautiful golf courses in the area. (Too many to list!)

Other outdoor fun – Plane & ATV

Georgian Bay Airways and BearClaw Tours would be great for those who have an older child, and a bit more $ to spend when it comes to an activity. Both offer a unique “Northern” experience!

2. Playground

Although it seems basic, there are quite a few nice playgrounds for the kids. Of course many are close to some of the beaches that we are going to visit, and others that are at a school or municipal building that offer some great free outdoor time.

3, Tower Hill, Museum and Gardens

The TOWER on Tower Hill has been a well known/visited spot in Parry Sound for years; it’s a tower that looks out over the town of Parry Sound. It also is the home to the Museum on Tower Hill, that showcase beautiful gardens. It’s a great place to take any visitor in Parry Sound to. The museum has great exhibits throughout the summer.

4. Farmer’s Markets

In addition to the market’s listed in the Fun in the Sun magazine, there are a few other regular Farmer’s Markets.

Tuesday’s – at the library

Friday’s – Rosseau

Carling – Saturday’s

McKellar – Saturday’s

5. Rainy Day Activities (or not rainy days….just wanted to group them together or my list would be more than 10!)

Bowling

Georgian Lanes offers several options, as well as birthday parties. It’s an affordable way to spend some time inside.

Library

The Town’s library has some great programs (that run all year long). There’s lots more than just going to read a book – there are crafts, reading tale sessions, learning sessions, reading club and a kids zone to name a few!

Skating

If up for the short drive, one could drive to the Humphrey Arena for some summer skating!

Bobby Orr Hall of Fame

Speaking of skating, our town is “on the map” due to Parry Sound hockey legend Bobby Orr. I worked at the Hall of Fame for 10 years, and can attest that a rainy day in the summer is BUSY! (If you’re a hockey lover, you might want to visit on a super hot day where you can enjoy hours of games, artifacts and memorabilia of the greatest hockey player.)

6. Music

For those that follow my personal blog Mommy Loves Music you’ll know that music is a big part of my life. And in Parry Sound, there’s usually some sort of musical event; be it a free outdoor concert series, music cruise on the Bay, a full fledge concert at the Stockey Centre or one of the weekly artist’s at The Brunswick. (And I couldn’t resist the plug for my friend’s putting on this show….Dolly Parton is coming to the PS area!)

7. Sports

Obviously I will include swimming and fishing again, but there are some other great options!

Baseball – there’s a great little league program.

Soccer – another great program.

Biking – so many great places to do so…especially the Fitness Trail, or the Rugged Trail. Or take note of the BOHF Triathlon (there’s a category for kids), or come and watch the Pedaling for Parkinson’s race. And there’s a great local bike shop (http://parrysoundbikes.com)!

8. Santa’s Village

This attraction is in Bracebridge (about an hour away from Parry Sound) and although I haven’t been there, I have heard nothing but great things from family and friends. We will attend this summer! (And if you register ahead of time, they’ll email you coupons and discounts so you can plan your visit and save a bit.)

9. Camping

I know that I have mentioned boating, fishing and swimming already, but these are an integral part of the camping experience. Although my camping days (both past and present) are limited, I do know how important the camping experience is. There’s really nothing better than pitching a tent, cooking over open fire (of course more than fish and hotdogs. ’Smores is mandatory at my campfires) and singing tunes.

10. Do nothing

Just breathe. Sit outside and smell that darn fresh air. Take a walk. Smell the flowers. Just chill out (ok, maybe bring a camera and book)…but honestly, life is so busy 95% of the time, I think that just taking time to do nothing is an essential part of enjoying summer in the Parry Sound area.

Obviously I have kept to the Parry Sound—Muskoka area for my 10 things to do. I hope that if you find time to come to the Parry Sound area, that one of these 10+ things to do will result in a great experience for you and your child!

Popsicles = Summer

Posted on July 12, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

Popsicles are the best summer treat. Bright colours, sweet flavours, they’re the perfect cool-down for a kiddo on the go that doesn’t want to stop playing. And hey, they’re on a stick!

photo: Jamieanne

I have a few favourite recipes, but the great thing about popsicles is, as long as you have a mould, you can basically make any flavour you want. Of course, the standard orange, grape or lemon are always a hit, but you can get creative.

Pudding pops: Did you know you can freeze jello and pudding? Just prep it the way the package recommends and just freeze it in the moulds instead of in a bowl in the fridge.

Getting fancy: This takes some time because each layer has to freeze, but if you prep several juices, you can pour in a layer, let it freeze, pour in the next colour, let it freeze – and so on, and so on, until you’ve built up layers of colourful stripes. Or, if you tip the mould on a bit of an angle and fill it half way, you can let it freeze, straighten it up and fill the other half for a funky two-tone effect.

photo: Abi Porter

Fruit pops: Add a little bit of diced fruit to your pops. For thicker mixtures you can blend in the fruit, for thin liquids you may want to fill half, let freeze, add some fruit and top off with juice so that the fruit is suspended in the middle.

The basics: Any juice will freeze. You can make fresh squeezed or buy pre-made juices. Just fill the moulds and freeze. Milk will freeze – you can add some instant coffee and some sugar for a sweet adult treat, or some powdered chocolate for a chocolate popsicle.

My kids are crazy fans of piña coladas, and love this one the best:

What you need:

– 1 can of coconut milk or coconut cream
– 1 cup of pineapple, diced
– 1/2 cup pineapple juice (or 1/4 cup syrup if you’re using canned pineapples)
– 2-3 tablespoons white sugar (omit if using syrup from canned pineapples)
– tiny chunks of coconut, optional

What you do:

In a blender or food processor, whip together liquids and sugar for 1 minute. Then add fruit. Pulse blend 4 or 5 times. Pour mixture into moulds. Freeze and serve.

(The adult version of this can be made by adding 2 to 3 ounces of rum to the mixture!)

Popsicle hack!!!

If you hate watching popsicles drip down your child’s arm, add a cupcake liner to the bottom of the popsicle to catch the drips!

Suggestions:

Cinnamon apple: 1 tsp cinnamon, 2 tablespoons white sugar, 4 cups of apple juice

Raspberry dream: 3 cups fresh raspberries, blended for 30 seconds, 2 tablespoons white sugar, 4 cups milk or light cream

Keylime pie: Keylime pie pudding prepared as directed on package

Mango tango: 4 cups mango juice blended with 1 cup of heavy cream and 2 talbespoons white sugar + mango chunks

And try out these moulds:

Onyx stainless steel moulds

Summer vs. Winter Cruising for Families

Posted on July 11, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Bon Voyage .

Summer is a great time for getaways as well as for researching and booking winter travel. We enjoyed speaking with cruise & travel expert Cynthia Joaquin so much that we decided to do a follow-up interview to discuss the differences between summer and winter cruising.

Courtesy of Royal Carribean

1.How is cruising in the summer months different than cruising in winter months?

It really depends on where you want to go. Certain destinations, such as Alaska or Canada/New England are only available in the summer time. On the other hand, Caribbean cruises are available year round. Also, whenever children are out of school, prices always go up and crowds get bigger.

2. What type of destinations do you recommend for summer cruising?

Some great options to keep in mind for the summer, if you are trying to keep costs down would be to cruise out of New York or New Jersey. You can drive to the port and park there for a small parking fee instead of paying for flights. Royal Caribbean’s brand new Anthem of the Seas is sailing out of New Jersey all summer this year.

3. What are your top destinations for cruising in winter months and what are the benefits?

In winter, I of course suggest warm destinations – Mexico, Caribbean, Bahamas, etc. When the ships pull certain itineraries in the winter you have more options sailing to the hot areas. Crowds tend to be smaller and pricing lower.

4. How is cruising different according to season?

Services on board are the same. However, your cruise itineraries and shore excursions differ depending on the time of year/temperature.

5. Any booking/travelers tips for cruising?

Certain destinations will have concerns with weather in terms of hurricane season/rainy season, but that never seems to slow down vacationers on cruises. The cruise lines have great technology to monitor the weather and avoid storms and skip/replace ports of call if they feel safety may be a concern. When you look at a place such as Alaska that is not available year round, summer tends to be their rainiest season but most popular.

When travelling in winter, we will stress more than ever the importance of arriving at your embarkation city the day before, to avoid any stresses with snow and possible flight delays/cancellations. And above all else we always recommend travel insurance. You just never know what can happen and we always want to protect our clients and their vacation.

Cruising in general is an amazing experience whether summer or winter. The ships continue to get bigger and better and cruising is only getting more popular so I’m sure the best is still yet to come.

Cynthia Joaquin is a franchise owner/manager of Expedia CruiseShipCenters which is a global leader in the marketing and sales of cruise vacations. Expedia CruiseShipCenters also provides resort and other land
vacation options, including air, car, hotel and travel insurance. Allowing the company to serve all travel needs.

www.cruiseshipcenters.com/CynthiaJoaquin

ECSCWoodbridge

Battle of the baby boards

Posted on July 7, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in The Struggle is Real .

I don’t know how parents did it before the Internet, but baby boards and parenting groups online seem to be the way we all share information.

So why all the fighting????

I love cruising parenting boards. I think it’s my favourite distraction. I love offering info, tips, and sometimes learning something new. The personal experiences are so interesting.

By nature I’m just a research junkie, so parenting boards scratch that itch for me. Of course, I’ve read Dr. Sears and Dr. Newman and Dr. Seuss, so I’ve got my foundation of highly regarded advice, but I’ve also read far too much about the far too unusual so I’m a bit of a Cliff Claven when it comes to parenting advice.

But the thing I don’t get is all of the fighting.

The Fighting!

Why all the bashing and trolling and arguing?

I think part of the problem is that there is no font for sarcasm. If there were a sarcasm font I believe half of the world’s problems would be solved and parenting boards would be a much safer place.

I think people start to become friends, and then want to back their friends up. If only we realized that being right has nothing to do with liking someone.

I think people are misinformed and just generalize information, or worse yet, assume what the answer should be, instead of being able to admit when they just don’t know. Like not being informed is a sign of bad parenting.

I think people are too ego-driven to be right.

Why even ask the question on a parenting board? You’re sitting at a computer. You’re typing a question. If you type the question into Bing, Google, Yahoo or any other search you’ll get some pretty verified answers.

Why crowdsource?

Crowdsourcing information is the best way to connect. It’s not about nailing the most perfect answer, it’s finding something to chat about with other mommies. A way to start a conversation. It’s a way to commiserate about a subject or dig and dig until you find an answer among the pile that suits you.

Motherhood can be very isolating.

You spend 24/7 with the babes. Of course, if you work out of the home then you spend 8/5 at work and the rest with the babes. With little time to chat with friends – and that time is spent chatting about your babies anyways when it does happen – baby boards allow you to connect with like-minded people and have a communal experience without having to be in the same room, the same city or even the same country.

I get the difference of opinions – vaccines, circumcision, natural childbirth – but I’m not referring to these big bad battles. These are the biggies, and they’ll wage on through the generations. I’m talking about posts like: Is it safe to give my child cow’s milk at 12 months? Can I eat sushi while pregnant? Should I pump and dump if I have a glass of wine?

photo: MiguelPhotoBooth

There is a lot of misinformation, and a lot of changing information. Then there’s the fact that everyone has a different risk threshold. There are, though, women who give advice that is in no way correct. Just utterly unfounded. And this scares me.

First, if you’re crowdsourcing your question and you decide to rely on someone because you like their profile pic, or they once liked one of your posts, then you’re in deep trouble. And if it were only about the mama, well then go ahead. But if the info is going to harm a wee once, that’s crazy.

And you see these wars rage on and on. I steer clear. I don’t want to be part of mama wars. I don’t really get it. If you need someone to fight with, should it really be someone you don’t know behind a computer monitor who is in a group you sometimes snoop? Is there really a need?

Then there are the people crowdsourcing names. That always goes sideways. It should really be a rule that your child is the first person to hear the name you’ve picked out. Because inevitable, if you crowdsource enough people, you’ll get some nasty remark, and then you won’t be happy.

But the most incredulous crowdsourcing I’ve seen to date are the brag-sourcing mamas. “My little babe is 9 months and can’t tie her shoes yet. She can sing opera in three languages, bake perfect quiche and recite all of the state capitals, but her motor skills aren’t quite what they should be. Should I be worried or wait until she’s 10 months to see if it works out?”

Sheesh. I can see why those posts go off the rails.

While baby boards are really cool and great ways to connect, sometimes it just makes me wonder – parenting is time consuming. If you’re busy waging a mama war on a baby board, who’s watching your kids!!!!

Mama and her two year old’s milestones

Posted on July 6, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Urban Suburban Mommy .

One month from today, I will officially be the mother of a 2 year old. WHOA! So many things come to mind, but as I have discussed, milestones are one of the main focuses. (And of course, celebrating it, which I will keep low key until 3!)

Here’s our list of “concerns/milestones/highlights”:

200 words

(I stopped counting at 170, and I deserve a medal for this). R’s and F’s continue to be a challenge. ‘Nuff said.

Resourceful

Tyson is SUPER resourceful! This was pointed out to me by one of my best friends who works in the child development field. She listens to me whine and complain about milestones (enter the 200 words) but reminds me of the many things that Tyson (Ian and I) are doing well.

Time Timer

I just learned what a time timer was a few months ago. Some would think, working in a school, that I would know what a time timer is. (Side note – it is ultimately a clock that has a countdown feature with the “hands of a clock so that kids can learn what 30 seconds,1 minute is, 20 minutes, etc).

Anyways, back to the time timer.

My friend encourages the use of a time timer at a young age, as we are always telling our kids “1 minute”, etc. I looked into the app, and chose not to purchase it as I do not need Tyson on my phone anymore than he already is! I am hoping to get a used one as I do like this idea of teaching Tyson what 1 minute is (or 20 minutes when I need to make dinner uninterrupted!).

Potty Training

YIKES! We’ve been encouraging the idea of the potty for the past few months just by having it next to our toilet. We purchased pull-ups. Close to his birthday, we are “committing” to this.

WISH. US. LUCK!

Food

It’s still a big deal – of course different than it was back at the 9-month mark of exploring all of the different meats. Now I’m trying to “let loose” and let my son eat processed meat. Or chocolate. Or ice cream. Any helpful suggestions? (I am serious).

Now, onto a 2 year old boy’s birthday plans. I could have a theme. And a special cake. And invite friends…. OR, I could just say wait until he’s 3.

Do I want to have a cake made? Sure, if it was free. This is no different than my opinion on the cake-smashing concept; it is just not for me. Tyson would likely enjoy it, but 10 years from now am I going to be happy that I spent $40 on a cake that he ate one bite of and then moved onto his new toy for the sandbox? Nope!

I am going to do a fun photoshoot with a local photographer to have an amazing set of pics to remember this time – pre birthday – which I will use the gift certificate that my good friend gave us at Tyson’s shower. The shoot will include a few fun fishing shots, and then I will host a small shin-dig at my parents’ or in-laws’ place.

I think that when he turns 3 my thoughts on his birthday, plans will become more exciting. A themed party, special invites, and likely loot bags. (side note – I have already started a board on Pinterest for potential party/theme ideas!)

But for now, give me the strength to make it through potty training!

Krista Holmes, KH Mgmt, became a mother in the summer of 2014. She works behind-the-scenes in the Canadian music industry, designs several social media campaigns and manages special events. Her love for motherhood & music can be found on her blog, mommylovesmusic.wordpress.com.

@KHmgmt

Hamburger Hamburger Hamburger

Posted on July 5, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

Lately, it seems it’s not good enough to have a good ‘ole charbroil going on, it’s a world of burger boutiques where garlic aiolis battle it out with caprese relishes and cilantro-infused mayos. Where emu, elk, lamb and bison burgers big-up the oldschool beef burger. My family loves a good burger, we’re connoisseurs, really, and love checking out the big new burger joints. So when my brother started taunting my husband that he’d found the Best Burger Ever, this was nothing to be taken lightly. My brother insisted we didn’t know from burgers until we’d tried The Burger Barn.

This past weekend we made our way out to Port Dover – a beachfront community on the shore of Lake Erie in Norfolk County, about 2 hours west of Toronto. We like long drives and beaches, so combining this with the quest for the Best Burger Ever seemed like a no-brainer.

The Burger Barn, 3000 4th Line in Ohsweken has the Best Burger Ever

My brother was right. We found the Best Burger Ever. Located on 4th Line, just off of Highway 6 in Ohsweken, there is, in fact, a building that looks like a big barn, and it is, in fact, The Burger Barn, and they do, in fact, have the Best Burger Ever. We ordered a few variations – one with brie, mushrooms, bacon and caramelized onions; one with dusted jalapeños, barbecue sauce and Monterey Jack, one with cheese, and one with nuthin’ but the bun – our 8 year old is a purist. The onion rings and the fries are spectacular sides. The bun – that bun… It is standout! Definitely worth the drive.

While we can’t make regular trips to The Burger Barn, the fact is, I make a mean burger. I really do. I may not have all of the crazy toppings, but it holds its own among boutique burgers. We barbecue everything – and we barbecue all year long – and this one’s a staple. Feel free to get fancy with the toppings!

What you need:

-2-3 pounds lean ground beef (regular is more tasty, extra-lean is a bit dry)
– 2 tablespoons salt
– 2 to 3 tablespoons garlic powder
– 2 teaspoons paprika
– 1 egg
– cracked pepper to taste
– burger buns

What you do:

Pre-heat the barbecue. In a large mixing bowl, mix all ingredients. Get in there with your hands and really mush that meat up. Take your mix out to the barbecue and form round patties, about a half-inch thick and about an inch wider than your buns. The actual size doesn’t matter, but it’s always nice to eat a burger that doesn’t get lost inside a big bun. Patties will shrink down a bit during cooking.

Start grilling. At the 4-minute mark give them a quarter turn. After 4 more minutes, flip and repeat. Those grill marks make you look pro, but the turn helps for even cooking. For bigger burgers you may want to go 10 minutes a side, for smaller burgers it will be 5 minutes a side. You don’t want to undercook ground beef, but you’ll have to tweak the recipe if you prefer your burgers medium or well-done.

Now for the toppings:

TexMex: Guacamole, salsa, cheese and jalapeños
French: Brie and dijon
Banquet: Bacon and cheddar
The Philly: A mix of sauteed mushrooms, onions and green peppers, smothered in cheese
The All-Canadian: Peameal bacon, cheddar and maple-glazed barbecue sauce
The Hellfire: Jalapeño havarti, tabasco mayo, hot peppers and peppercorn crusted bacon

Share your creations with us!

Why I love live clean products

Posted on June 29, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Mommy Approved .

One of the first articles that I ever wrote for our blog was a product review for live clean shampoo and wash. I discovered the brand with my second child and instantly fell in love.

Recently, we were lucky enough to receive a care package of live clean products and I am over the moon. Our family has since tried and tested every single product and each is better than the next. There is something for everyone in the family.

Why I love Live Clean Products:

Plant and Natural Ingredients
SLS/Sulfate Free/DEA free
Paraben, Phthalate and Phosphate Free
Pure Vegan and Vegetarian
Cruelty Free Biodegradable Ingredients
Recyclable Packaging
Enriched with Certified Organic Botanical Extracts

Not only are the products hypoallergenic but they also smell great!

I give the following baby & kids products a thumbs up!

Live Clean Baby Soothing Vapour Bubble Bath & Wash

My LO loves his bath time and I love it even more because of the relaxing scent. This product is formulated with natural essential oils of Rosemary, Eucalyptus and Menthol, recognized and trusted for their soothing aromatherapy properties. I find bath time a calming experience for me too!

Live Clean Shea Cocoa Butter Baby Lotion

This is a fairly new product and like the rest of the Live Clean line of products that scent is just delectable. I often steal the baby lotion from my 4 year old and lather it on myself. Me and my boys have terribly dry skin – but this product really does leave a deep moisture and leaves our skin super soft.

Live Clean Kids Mixed Berry Body + Hair Wash

Certified Organic Strawberry, Blueberry and Raspberry extracts along with rich Apricot Oil give Live Clean Kids Mixed Berry Body + Hair Wash = the most delicious fragrance and the most delicious & clean 4 year old. It lathers beautifully and leaves my son’s skin and hair perfectly clean, soft and hydrated. And the easy-grip bottle is perfect for smaller hands. My son can pour the wash onto his little face cloth and wash himself.

Beyond baby and kids products, Live Clean also offers awesome products for moms & dads, for travel and even for your dog. I encourage you to try their products – I promise you that you will be pleased! There are over 100 products to choose from!

5 Communication tips to make sure you are heard

Posted on June 27, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in The Best You .

When you speak – you want people to listen (especially our partners and children). Although most people think that if you yell, you will be heard. It’s quite the opposite. I have put together 5 effective communication strategies to help you succeed in the art of conversation and ensure that your message is well-received and understood.

1.Stay Calm and Be Positive

Use your words to help you, not sabotage you. If you communicate with anger and negativity, no one will listen. If you’ve got your back up, you need to address it – before you start talking. Take a timeout so you can calm down and see clearly. Often, when you wait it out, your perceptions will change and you can reclaim your perspective. Calm tells the other person that you want to address the issue as a win-win situation.

2.Choose Your Words Carefully

Before you speak, consider the words you choose. Never begin a conversation on the attack. If you start a sentence with You, Why or What, you may come across as accusatory and your conversation will be interpreted as ‘I’m right, you’re wrong’. Try instead to start with “I” phrases that take ownership of your feelings such as, ‘I noticed that…, I appreciate it when you X, and when X happens, it…, I know it was with good intentions that…, , or, I love that you’….When you begin your sentences with feelings about the other person first, the other person is more likely to welcome being invited into the conversation and hear what you’re saying.

3. Watch Your Tone

Your tone sets the stage. The tone you take can make or break a conversation regardless of the words you use. Even the nicest of intentions can sound hurtful or accusatory, if you choose the wrong tone. How do you keep your tone on track? Keep calm and positive, but don’t forget to also be kind and firm. You can talk all you want, but if your tone is sending a different message, nothing you say will help you.

4. Consider Your Body Language

What is your body saying about your intent? If you want to be heard, not only do you have to watch what you say, but you also have to be mindful of what your body is saying as as well. Direct eye contact is key. Holding your phone, a pen, a food item? You won’t be taken seriously if you’re trying to convey a message while multitasking. Focus on one thing. If you want respect and validation, you also have to give it.

Get on-level too.

That means, if the other person is standing, you stand. If they’re sitting, you sit. Your goal is not only to create rapport and buy-in so your party listens, but also demonstrate that you are equals in the conversation.

Conversing with your children? Get down to their level. You don’t want to be over-bearing, a bully, or be a parent who imparts a dictatorship style of parenting. Fill their power buckets. Empower your children. That is, after all, your job.

5. Be Thankful

Giving thanks is an important step that many people forget. Let the other person know you appreciate them for not only taking the time to listen, but for hearing you and taking part in the conversation. Gratitude sets up a positive platform not just for the relationship and your expectations, but also for the next time you need to get something off your chest. All relationships hit bumps in the road and require continual communication to overcome barriers.

When you feel thankful, you allow the other person to feel thankful too, and that’s good insurance for the next time you need to have a conversation or chat with your child, or anyone for that matter.

Final thoughts: Listening and hearing are two different things. Hearing someone speak is not the same as listening to what they’re saying. Listen. Be an active participant. Lead by example.

Happy Communicating!

In practice for over 12 years, Lauren Millman is a highly sought-after Toronto Marriage & Relationship Coach and Counsellor, Mental Health Practitioner and Parenting Specialist, and is a member of the Ontario Association for Family Mediation. Lauren is a regular guest contributor on TV’s Rogers Daytime! York Region, and The Mediation Station. She has also been a guest on SiriusXM Radio Canada. Lauren is an international best- selling author, writes regularly for several online publications including Brazenwoman, PinkandBlue North America, and SiriusXM Canada, and was recently featured in the Toronto Star. Lauren continuously gives back to the community. In 2014, Lauren was the Recipient of the International Women In Leadership Award.

I wanted a C-section

Posted on June 24, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in The Struggle is Real .

I was speaking to Michelle after reading her recent post on C-sections. It’s funny because I remember her telling me she couldn’t even discuss it when I asked her about her delivery with her first. I love a good birth story, but she just wasn’t over hers – and I didn’t push it.

photo: Kelly Sue DeConnick

Some birth stories aren’t great experiences. I get it. Mine were both vaginal deliveries. My second was sunny-side up, making the back labour an intense experience of epically painful proportions. With my first, the epidural I wanted so badly ended up slowing down my labour so, with the second, I opted for the last-minute epi, just to help with the pushing, so that my labour would go faster.

Gawd, that hurt!

The tearing and subsequent stitching with my first was brutal. Lots of stitches, lots of trouble sitting, lots of discomfort relieving myself – and let me tell you, the “husband stitch” you hear about – that’s a real thing. The doctor told me I would thank him for it. Or maybe that comment was directed at my husband, because I was most definitely not impressed or even happy with that medical procedure.

photo: Kelly Sue DeConnick

I really didn’t want to do the whole vaginal birth thing. My first pregnancy was in 2007/2008, and people were starting to talk about scheduled C-sections, but talking about scheduling a c-section brought out the birth shaming:

What kind of mother schedules a baby out of convenience?

What kind of mother chooses surgery over nature’s method?

Who chooses surgery?

Me.

ME!!!!!

It wasn’t out of convenience, it was out of fear.

Fear that it would hurt? Fear that there could be complications? Fear that he might get stuck?

Nope.

It was fear that my favourite body part would get all stretched out to hell, and that my sex life would never be the same. While I get the severe pain and invasive nature of a c-section, the longterm effects are minimal. That scar heals up small. It’s rough but it heals. It might even itch. Yes, I know, there’s even the occasional complication. But I’ve never been a big fan of anything that shows off that part of my belly – or any part of my belly – anyways.

I wasn’t afraid of giving birth, I was afraid of vaginal trauma – and, for the record, I was absolutely right. Once you stretch something to its max, it won’t go back. Don’t believe me? Think about how an inflated balloon looks after letting the air out, or how much looser those skin-tight jeans are on the second day.

photo: Kelly Sue DeConnick

The Kegel freak that I am, I’ve always Kegeled. It’s a favourite passtime. I’m Kegeling right now.

I like (ahem, liked) having great tone and I really enjoyed the sex I had. Since 2008 I’ve redoubled my Kegel efforts. I took up squats and lunges too, since my friend Anne swore they yielded three times the results.

Nada.

I shouldn’t say nada – I don’t have horrible tone, but I don’t think I’ll ever even approach the tone I had pre-babies. Wasn’t giving up my boobs, my beloved sleep and last shred of sanity enough for the cause? No? Give up the jayjay too? Fine.

I did, and I’d do it again, if I had to. But why did I have to?

I wanted a scheduled C-section. I didn’t care about schedules or control or even picking the birthdays – I wanted to preserve my vagina.

It was not to be.

My doctor was not one that believed in elective surgery over vaginal delivery. I remember my husband asking her if scheduling would be an option because I’d mentioned it to him. She said absolutely not. It would only happen if it were to become a medical necessity, otherwise she felt I was strong and healthy and there was no reason to take on the risks of surgery.

Now, I’m not sure why. People are allowed to have surgery for all kinds of elective reasons, so why not childbirth?

I know – all of the C-section mamas think I’m crazy, but I bet a few of the 3rd degree tear mamas are saying a resounding “Amen” to all the things I’m preaching.

photo: Kelly Sue DeConnick

I get the subtle nuances, the benefits of letting baby come when they want – but as my blood pressure went up, my doctor started talking about induction. Now that’s not all that natural, and it comes with risks – so why threaten to induce me? Just give me my C-section!

My babies were full term and my only goal was to get them out of my body and into this world healthy and safe. Each ended up having some sort of complication that almost required a C-section, so why not JUST GIVE ME MY C-SECTION.

I know lots of moms that just want to experience vaginal birth and feel something was taken from them when they, instead, were rushed into surgery with life-threatening situations. But their kids aren’t any worse off for not sliding into home plate vaginally – so why not just give me my C-section?

Not sure why the stigma still exists around scheduling a C-section. Who really cares if the mom is doing it for her own convenience – or the preservation of her vagina. There are a lot of things we choose to do, and those choices are personal.

But the choice was not there, and my quest for a scheduled C-section went unfulfilled. So, every year on July 27, while wishing my first-born a happy birthday, I take a moment to myself, a moment of silence for my vagina at precisely 2.02pm.

photo: Kelly Sue DeConnick

Managing your fro and frizz in the humidity

Posted on June 23, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in The Best You .

We all have those horrible hair days where humidity gets the best of us.

My hair turns into a huge frizzy mushroom head.

(Urban Mommy Elisa and Suburban Mommy Michelle chime in here to add a resounding ditto! Huge fro and frizz all around!)

Real Sexy Hey 😂😂😂😉

As a professional stylist I am always interested in finding new products that help hair perform its best. I’ve come across some great new products that we started to carry In our salon @kaboomhairsalon called evo

I’m loving our new line!

I thought I would share a few of my favourites to battle those frizzy, big hair kind of days. I also have a couple of hair styling tips that should help you out on those hot summer days 😎

The Great Hydrator Moisture Mask – Conditions, adds moisture, reduces frizz while greatly improving hair manageability

Happy Campers – Leave in moisturizer. Restores moisture and protects from the sun

Easy Tiger Straightening Balm – Tames curls and those fly always with weighted conditioning

Icon Welder – Helps protect hair form hot tools and humidity

Love Touch Shine Spray – Helps protect from humidity and fight frizz

The Therapist – Calming shampoo and conditioner. Prevents fading colour, hydrates and moisturizes dry frizzy hair

evo products

And here are a few of the most popular looks for this summer. Taming the mane has never been easier than with these styles, even in the humidity:

Braids braids braids. Love this look. Not only is it a great way to keep your out of control mane tucked away from the face it also is a softer pretty style that’s one of the hottest hair trends for summer 2016

Another hot hair trend that goes great with your bikini poolside, or perfect for a sexy date night is the tight and slicked back. It’s hot, clean and perfectly under control.😍👌🏻

Remember ladies, always treat your hair like you treat your skin. With lots of moisture and love. ❤️

Erica H. Wearing has been a stylist for over 16 years and she absolutely loves what she does . “It’s a great feeling to help people feel and look their best when they leave my chair. I wouldn’t trade this for any other job in the world!”
Check out Erica at Ka!Boom Hair Salon 1129 West Pender Street, Vancouver B.C .
(604)681-6003

hairbyericaw

Cheesy manicotti

Posted on June 21, 2016 by Urban Suburban Mommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

Not just a great stylist, this talented mama knows her way around the salon – and the kitchen! While we LOVE LOVE LOVE the great hair advice we usually receive from Erica Wearing, and we’re looking forward to a post on taming the frizzies later this week (my big mess of curls is currently begging for help as they boost out of all control!!) she’s kindly shared her Magnificent Manicotti recipe – it’s cheesy, in a good way – and you won’t be disappointed!!Add something tasty to your family’s Italian dinner tonight! Serve baked manicotti shells placed on beef mixture sprinkled with cheese.

What you need:

– 14 uncooked manicotti shells (or oven-ready if you prefer)
– 1lb lean ground beef
– 1 large onion, chopped
– 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
– 1 jar (26 to 30 oz) tomato pasta sauce (choose your favorite – or make your own)
– 2 boxes (9 oz each) frozen chopped spinach, thawed
– 2 cups small curd cottage cheese
– 12 mushrooms (or an 8 oz can, drained, if you prefer)
– 1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese
– 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
– 1/4 teaspoon pepper
Topping:
– 2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese (8 oz)
– 2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

What you do:

First you need to cook the manicotti as directed on package, and drain. Use the minimum cooking time, this will help to prevent the shells from tearing while filling. I used the oven-ready shells and just skipped this step – it’s up to you!

To prepare the beef:
In a large skillet, cook the beef, onion and garlic over medium heat, about 8 to 10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until beef is brown. Drain off and stir in pasta sauce.
Preheat the oven to 350°. Spray a 13 by 9-inch glass baking dish with nonstick – or grease and flour to prep the dish.

To prepare the manicotti shell filling:
Squeeze thawed spinach to drain excess moisture. Spread it out on paper towel, pat dry. Mix spinach, cottage cheese, mushrooms, 1/3 cup Parmesan cheese, nutmeg and pepper in a mixing bowl.

Putting it all together:
Use one cup of the beef to line the bottom of the prepared baking dish. Fill manicotti shells with spinach mixture. Place the shells on top of the beef mixture in dish. Pour remaining beef mixture evenly over shells. Try to get the shells completely covered. Sprinkle liberally with mozzarella cheese and 2 tablespoons Parmesan cheese.

Cover and bake 30 minutes. Uncover and bake 20 to 25 minutes longer or until hot and bubbly.

photo: AlanaGKelly

hairbyericaw

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