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Monthly Archives: September 2016

Smotherhood

Posted on September 28, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in The Struggle is Real .

My husband keeps saying things like “Give them a longer leash” and “Stop hovering” – and it’s finally starting to sink in. My boys aren’t babies any more, they need a little more independence and opportunity to spread their wings.

But I *can’t* let them. Because I’m ‘that’ mom.

photo: Vicchi

photo: Vicchi

 

I have spent 8 years behaving like there’s a pedophile hiding behind every tree just waiting for me to take my eyes off of one of my boys for 3 consecutive seconds. I’m so sure I’ve got the cutest boys in the world that there are people waiting to snatch one should I drop my guard for literally seconds. I’ve been neurotically hovering and monitoring and keeping tabs for 8 years now, and I’m finding it a bit hard to break the habit.

photo: Gwidion M. Williams

photo: Gwidion M. Williams

You’re either thinking:

A) Of course you can’t take your eyes off of your kids, what is your husband thinking?

or

B) Are you insane? Let them be kids.

For 8 years I’ve said to my husband “I just can’t take chances if I can’t handle the consequences.” I don’t recognize myself when I say bizarre ‘grown-up’ phrases like that because I was the cool one, the care-free one, the one that flew by the seat of my pants, hitch-hiked across Europe, went traveling solo – independent as the day is long from a very early age, and I turned out just fine.

But I’m not that person any more. When it comes to my children, I become utterly and freakishly helicopter-ish.

At 6 and 8, both of them are physically a few years bigger than most of their friends. We grow them big. ’99th percentile’ big. They’re loud. Very, very loud. Nobody in their right mind would be silly enough to grab big, loud boys and think they could make a stealthy get-away – but still I can’t calm down.

I don’t want to be this crazy, but I am. Parenthood has done this to me.

I swear, I don’t know if I’ll ever be normal again.

photo: Ruth Hartnup

photo: Ruth Hartnup

But I’m trying. This summer I let them play in the park, more than 10 feet away from me. I let them go swimming without going into the pool myself. I trusted the lifeguards, I trusted my ability to watch and react, instead of bracing for the imminent worst case scenario.

(Did I mention my husband refers to me as Worst Case Scenario Girl? Yes, my super-power is hysterical and excessive worrying about things least likely to come to pass.)

He fought me on the leash – dare I say “put his foot down” about it. The little one has always been a runner, a wanderer, a hard one to keep by my side. When I can’t see him I will often joke that he’s probably already gotten into his Über, and is half way across town. (But in my head it’s not a joke). I wanted to put a leash on him to save my own sanity, but my husband was having NONE of it.

None.

I have made it this far! Anyone else having trouble giving up the hovering?

 

Tags: hard, helicopter, hover, hovering, independence, leash, parenting, swimming, worst case scenario .

Disney – should you stay on the resort?

Posted on September 22, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Bon Voyage .

It’s a question that comes up again and again – you’re planning a trip to Disney – should you stay at a Disney resort? We caught up with Clara Power from TPI, an authorized Disney vacation planner agency and she explains the many perks of staying on a Walt Disney World resort. Continue reading →

Tags: child friendly, Disney, fast pass, magic bands, magic hours, resort, rides, stay on the resort, travel, vacation .

10 Questions with a Lactation Consultant

Posted on September 21, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in 10 Questions With .

Breastfeeding can be hard. Some of us have tried it and had no problems at all, but going through parenting boards and Facebook groups and mommy blogs, it seems to be one part of motherhood that so many of us had no idea would be so challenging.

From problems with latching to concerns about over or under production to finding the right technique, it’s not as straight forward as we all once thought it would be. So we caught up with professional Lactation Consultant Rose Le Blanc (IBCLC, CPD) www.roseleblanc.com to ask the questions you know you want to know about breastfeeding.

1. Why is breastfeeding so hard?

We never see women breastfeeding any more. Long ago when we lived in close-knit communities, women and girls were surrounded by breastfeeding women most of their lives – consistently seeing the latching, positions and techniques involved. Our society is now so removed from breastfeeding women, that often times when women have their first baby and begin breastfeeding, they feel at a loss as to how to latch and manage a feed. The confidence is not there, and this is mostly because they are doing it/seeing it for the first time. I think this is one reason; other reasons include hospital births where c-sections, use of narcotics and hours of intravenous fluids are the new normal. Such situations set up babies for a slower start, with less access to the breast and more trouble latching. Babies are born swollen with these intravenous fluids and are weighed within minutes of birth only to lose most of the fluids in their diaper later on. These early weigh-ins are often the reason in the next 1 to 3 days for higher than normal percentages of weight loss, leading to unnecessary introduction of supplements in the hospital. I see this all the time!

2. Most people don’t hear about the difficulty until they’re actually about to have a baby or are starting to try to breastfeed, why is it such a well kept secret?

There is a lot of focus on the pregnancy and labour/delivery. I think it’s mostly because of the fear around labour and delivery, the unknown of when it’s going to happen and how it is going to feel. Many assume that their bodies are made for breastfeeding ,so there shouldn’t be any problems/questions – it should just happen.

I think this also goes back to our culture of not seeing breastfeeding on a regular basis. When we don’t see it, we don’t think about it.

3. What may hinder the ability to breastfeed?

Besides the issues that come about from my answers to question #1, about 50 per cent of my clients have babies with a tongue tie. Others babies have tight jaws likely due to birth which restricts their ability to open wide at the breast, causing nipple pain and sometimes decreasing milk supply leading to inefficient transfer of milk. Most of my clients have multiple reasons for their difficulties, and this is where my job becomes similar to an investigator – working to find all the pieces of the puzzle to solve the case. Once the case is solved, we figure out together what the most suitable plan is based on the client’s breastfeeding goals.

4. Does age – specifically ‘advanced maternal age’ have anything to do with how well I will be able to breastfeed? 

I don’t believe age is an issue. I’ve had clients of all ages and anecdotally, I can say there is no correlation between age and milk supply, for example. I also think it is dangerous when LC’s make such assumptions because, as I said earlier, there are usually multiple reasons for the breastfeeding problem. When we focus on age (something we can do nothing about), it takes away from the pieces that we can solve.

5. Is it true that a breast reduction or implants will affect your ability to breastfeed?

Sometimes they cause problems with supply and sometimes all goes fine. It really depends on whether major glands were damaged or not. Often times it is how the surgery is done – incisions furthest from the nipple and smallest are best. I don’t like to prejudge about the situation when first see a mom. What is most important is watching a breastfeed to see what the baby is doing at the breast – drinking well or not so well and why gives me the most information.

photo: Benjamin Magaña

photo: Benjamin Magaña

 

6. What helps bring up milk supply?

Babies are the best at maintaining good milk supply. Feeding on demand with both breasts at each feed – when your baby is showing hunger cues (hands to mouth, smacking lips, licking lips) is the best way to maintain good milk supply. It is normal to experience a number of growth spurts in the first year and with these growths spurts comes a baby that is feeding more frequently. Frequent feeds bring an increase in milk supply. If you feel like you don’t have enough, simply managing the feed differently can bring on more – compressing your breasts and offering multiple sides during feeds. If this doesn’t work, seeking help from a good LC is important.

7. What might hurt milk supply – is there any food, or over-the-counter medications to avoid?

Oral antihistamines, oral decongestants such as pseudoephedrine (sudafed) and hormonal birth control can cause a decrease in supply. In general, if you have a cold or allergies when breastfeeding try to use medications that can be taken as a nasal spray, eye drops or ointment. With birth control, it’s best to go with a non-hormonal option while breastfeeding, such as a barrier method or copper IUD. Otherwise, most medications are safe to take. A good place to check to be sure your medication is safe to take while breastfeeding or won’t affect milk supply is motherisk.org

8. Is there anything I can do to help save my breasts from the effects of breastfeeding?

Studies have shown that it is the breast changes that occur during pregnancy along with genetics that cause the shape/size of your breasts post-breastfeeding, not breastfeeding itself. However, there is hope as the pectoral muscles are what support and control the way your breasts hang. Working your pectoral muscles more with weights and natural movement when your body is ready can help bring your breasts back to their pre-baby state. Also, avoiding underwire and heavily padded bras can help avoid gravity’s pull on your breasts. Such bras take away the work and natural loads your pectoral muscles are meant to do and support leaving these muscles to atrophy. When muscles are no longer used, the tissues they support (the breasts in this case) lose the elasticity they once had.

9. Does breastfeeding really help lose the baby weight?

For most women breastfeeding does help them lose baby weight, but certainly not all. Studies show that our bodies burn approximately 20 calories per ounce of breast milk produced. So, if a baby eats 20-30 ounces a day, that’s anywhere between 400-600 calories burned. Much of it depends on your metabolism and how fit you were before pregnancy. This said, I always say to my clients to be gentle with your body and give it time to heal, especially in the first year after birth. Walking and carrying your baby are great exercises to do. Jumping back into a workout routine too early, particularly one that is high impact and/or core focused can damage your pelvic floor.

10. If I have problems breastfeeding one baby, does it mean I won’t be able to breastfeed my next?

With each pregnancy brings growth of more milk glands, and so typically more milk is produced after each consecutive pregnancy. The mature milk often comes in earlier within the first week with the second child as well – helping you get off to good start. It’s certainly worth giving it another try with that extra boost of milk. However, every baby is different – latch, use of tongue and sensitivity to changes in flow. You never know what you’re going to get! 🙂

rose-le-blanc-colourRose Le Blanc is a Lactation Consultant (IBCLC, CPD)
She can be reached for appointments and consulting at 416-454-5307, and offers a free, no obligation phone consultation. She has worked with the renowned lactation expert, Dr. Jack Newman and together they developed a clear and concise resource guide app for breastfeeding families and Lactation Consultants, Physicians, Nurses and Midwives who support breastfeeding families. Visit the site for more details. www.roseleblanc.com

twitter@LCRoseLB

 

facebook iconRose Le Blanc LC

Tags: 10 questions, breast, breast feeding, breast mik, Dr. Newman, featuredxx, glands, good start, lactation consultant, milk .

Easy peanut sauce

Posted on September 21, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

I love peanut sauce. When I go for Thai food I usually end up ordering an extra two or three sides of peanut sauce. It’s one of those flavours that I just can’t get enough of. Some people are like this with Swiss Chalet sauce, some people are like this with plum sauce, I’m like this with peanut sauce. I think part of it was that I so rarely got to have Thai food that it was a real treat. Continue reading →

Tags: crunchy, nom, peanut sauce, recipe, rice, rice bowl, side dish, smooth, thai .

The lunch lady cometh

Posted on September 18, 2016 by Alexis Nicols Posted in The Struggle is Real .

My four year old couldn’t wait to go back to school. Frankly, I encouraged the enthusiasm.

We had quite a busy summer (in much the same way that ants get busy once someone follows them around with a magnifying glass and sets their ant hill ablaze) and I think we could all use some back to school routine. He has a new backpack, new socks and a new outlook on life – mommy and daddy know nothing. But that’s another post. Continue reading →

1 Comment .
Tags: back to school, favourite foods, featuredxx, hot lunch, lunch, Lunch Box, lunch program, order, picky eater, sammich .

Back to School Essentials

Posted on September 16, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Mommy Approved, Sponsored Post .

Phew – we made it through the first couple weeks of school. One of my biggest challenges is packing a lunch – and then praying that the entire contents have been eaten. Continue reading →

Tags: back to school, caffeine, DAVIDsTeas, Essential Mints, featuredxx, Finding Dory, Lunch Box, school, Style, thermos .

TIFF Re-cap and movies to watch out for in theaters

Posted on September 15, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Fame & Fam .

TIFF is officially over in a couple days but you still may bump into a celebrity in downtown Toronto if you are lucky. Urban Suburban Mommy had the pleasure interviewing Chris Jancelewicz, National Online Reporter, Entertainment for Global about his take on the TIFF, celebrities and movies to watch out for, coming to theaters near you. Continue reading →

Tags: Arrival, Disney, featuredxx, Gimme Danger, La La Land, Manchester by the Sea, Moonlight, Movies for kids, Queen of Katwe, Ryan Gosling, TIFF, TIFF 2016 .

ABCs are not as easy as 1-2-3!

Posted on September 14, 2016 by mommylovesmusic Posted in The Struggle is Real .

As many of you know, I have been doing my best to ensure that my son had 200 words by the time he was 2.

Thankfully he reached that goal. Continue reading →

Tags: 123, 2, abc, alphabet, learn, milestone, sing, study .

Cinnamon bun-a-licious

Posted on September 13, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

I love to bake. I go through phases where I try to bake a big batch of one thing a week so that I can feel good about putting something homemade and yummy into their lunch bags as a treat. My cinnamon buns are always a favourite. Continue reading →

2 Comments .
Tags: cinnamon buns, cream cheese icing, homemade, icing, nom, nut free, nuts, recipe, safe for school, tasty tuesday .

Preschool jitters and anxiety. And that’s just you….

Posted on September 9, 2016 by Lauren Millman, B.A. Social Psychology, Behaviour, International Best Selling Author Posted in The Best You .

It’s here.

It’s happened.

In the blink of an eye, they’re suddenly big kids, and the first day of school – or preschool or daycare has arrived. Continue reading →

Tags: anxiety, back to school, consistency, expect the worst, expectation, jitters, stress .

I love making school lunches! (Said no mother, ever.)

Posted on September 6, 2016 by urbansuburbanmommy Posted in Delicious Dishes .

About a week ago I started noticing all of the social media posts about school lunches. There were the “What’s the best container on the market?” discussions. There were parents asking if the school hot lunch programs were worth the money. (Yes! The answer is YES!) Continue reading →

1 Comment .
Tags: bento, breakfast for lunch, dim sum, easy foods, featuredxx, Kid's lunch ideas, lunch, picky eater, sandwich, soup, sushi, thermos, Timpany, yumbox .
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