This dawned on me as I was sitting at Sick Kids hospital with my son for five hours this morning and then deciding to call it ‘A vacation day’ because I’d already missed more work than I wanted to make up.
My VACATION days are sacrificed for my children. Gladly.
Dinner? I make what THEY want.
Girls weekends in Vegas? Sorry, little bunny has a school play that Friday.
Honestly, when I realized I was sacrificing my purse and shoe addiction collection in order to fund the needs of these children, I knew I’d discovered the selflessness of motherhood.
Plus the staying up with sick kids, trading sleep for snuggles when they have bad dreams, playing board games (or bored games, I need a break from Candyland!), and sitting through hours of Dora, Caillou and Ruby – because, let’s face it, I really never need to hear any of those voices again – tell the tale.
We don’t have to NOT be moms, there’s no stopping that train, but we need to remember that we are also human beings. When was the last time a day was all about you? How about half-a-day? How about three consecutive hours?
It’s time to take a vacation day and use it. It’s time to leave them at daycare and NOT feel guilty on a day off. It’s time to pick a movie we want to see for once, go swimming without having to “watch this!” or spend time with a friend having tea without interruptions every minute, on the minute. It’s time to make a real dinner with adult flavours and real china instead of pandering to the mini masses.
It’s not a rejection of motherhood. I LOVE being a mom. I think that’s why it’s so easy to put myself last and worry more over their needs than mine. There’s no way I can possibly refuse to wake up for a nightmare or a sick child, but there are ways to carve out time for us and not be *just a mom* – and by JUST, I don’t minimize motherhood, not for one second. Motherhood is all-encompassing, I do it because I think it’s the biggest, best and most important job there is. But it’s time to rethink it and not make motherhood the only recognizable part of the people we are.
Next vacation day I’m hitting the spa, drinking champagne and buying myself something pretty.
(Unless my kids really need me!)